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Hello.

Welcome to my Internet home. Undoubtedly I have said something somewhere on the Internet that made you wonder who the heck is this guy and why would he say that.

Right. Me.

This is me. Uh.  I may or may not have a beard, goatee, spiked hair, long hair, possibly even a hat right now. I’m also varying degrees of chubby.  I haven’t decided who I want to be when I grow up.

I believe the children are the future. Teach them well and… Wait. No. That’s not.. uh.

Ok. So. I write stories. I play music.  I buy red guitars.  I scream at microphones.  I take selfies with goats.

My writing is influenced by all writers that I have read over the years and I read widely, but I would say some prominent ones are David Eddings, Robert Jordan, Douglas Adams, Robert Asprin, L.E. Modesitt jr, Mark Twain, John Grisham, Nelson DeMille, Carl Hiaasen, JK Rowling, Dan Brown. and many, many others.  Ok, maybe not many, many.  Maybe not even all of those listed, but I’ve certainly seen the covers of their books before.  I think.

Musically, I am influenced by squeaky dog toys, the hum of a turbo charged engine, the echoing warble of intergalactic space portals, and  Britney Spears.  It’s hard to explain.

I’m pretty sure selfies with goats is self-explanatory.

If you are here, I have probably offended you. I am offended that you are offended. Wait. No. I am deeply apologetic. Really. I love everyone. I don’t take anything seriously or personally. Well, unless it is serious and personal. I’m also very shallow. I’m so shallow I’m deep.

I believe life will always be Happily Ever After because life is what you make it.

You probably stopped reading shortly after the picture, so I don’t know why I am still typing.

Thanks. You are AWESOME!

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